Don't Insult The Sound Guy

This is a thing that shouldn't even need mentioning, yet we've seen it violated over and and over again.
Don't insult the sound engineer. He has the power to make your band sound great or terrible depending on his attitude and your interaction with him.

Many new bands or those with limited gigging experience may not have run into the kind of disaster that can happen when you don't get along with the sound guy. There is a reason why the most successful touring acts bring their own sound engineer with them. You never really know what you're going to get. Sound guys (and sometimes gals) run the gamut from terrifically helpful to prima-donald assholes. If you're touring around at the bar or club level you're going be at the mercy of whoever happens to be working the sound board that night. Many of these guys have college degrees in sound engineering, many more used to be musicians themselves and they all have different personalities. If you're lucky, you'll get a pro who takes pride in his work. If you're not lucky you may get an overworked, deaf hack with a wicked hangover from the night before, or worse, he may be killing that hangover by getting drunk early. Either way, you want to follow a few simple rules.

1. Always be nice to the sound engineer (even if he's an ass to you). Treat him like a highly skilled professional (even if he doesn't act like one). Do not treat him like a DJ who's never run sound before and is in way over his head (even if he is).
2. Keep in mind that every room is different and the sound guy probably knows better what sounds right in his room than you do. No, it won't sound the same as it does in your rehearsal space, it's not supposed to. It's supposed to sound better than that for the audience, who are listening through different speakers than you are.
3. Do what the sound guy tells you to do. He's trying really hard to make you sound great, but if your volumes are wrong on the stage, there's only so much he can do. If he asks you to turn your amp down, do it! Then, if you can't hear your instrument, ask for him to turn it up in your monitor. This goes double during sound check (If you're lucky enough to get one)
4. Never ever ask the crowd "How does it sound?" The Sound guy will likely take that as an insult. The same is true for going out on the dance floor or seating area to listen. You are responsible for what comes out of your instrument, let the sound guy worry about the rest of the room. Never tell him that it doesn't sound right in the room, unless it's a very serious problem. Over sensitive sound guys will take this as an insult. Chances are, the audience will let him know if it's really bad and obviously his fault.
5. Start and Stop on time. Often times it falls to the sound guy to tell you how much time you have left to play. When he tells you there's time for one more, he means one more song of about the same length as the other songs in your set, not one more 30 minute jam after your set of 5 minute songs. If you are an opening act and you play too long or start late and insist on doing your full set, you may be pissing off not only the sound guy (who now has less time to get the next act up) you may be pissing off the headliner, which now has to cut their set short. If you are the headliner, there may be local rules or laws that require the band to be done or the bar to be closed before a certain time. We know you're having fun and the fans are screaming for more, but don't play over without getting some kind of permission or an OK from the sound guy or someone, else in charge. The Pros plan their set lengths to include time for encores, so should you.
6. Get your gear off/on the stage quickly. This is most important if there are bands scheduled to play after you. There's only so much time allowed to get you off stage and the next band on. If you're really quick about it, they may actually ask you to play a little longer to fill in the time. That's the best way to be. If you're the headliner, there's still a sound guy who has to pack up his equipment and clean off the stage before he can go home. Be nice to him. Don't leave a bunch of empty beer bottles, cigarette butts and snack wrappers all over the place. If you bring it on the stage, take it off with you. That includes the set lists you taped to the monitor or mic stand, too.
7. Don't be afraid to ask for more of something in the monitor. This is especially true during sound check (if you get one), but also OK to ask for between songs. You need to hear yourself and your bandmates in order to make sure you're playing or singing right. Don't be timid and then complain that you couldn't hear yourself afterwards. That doesn't help the band. If he can't give you more without creating feedback, then you may need to turn your rig down or maybe just point it in another direction. That may be something you'll have to get the hang of by playing a lot of gigs, but if you ask the sound guy for suggestions he's likely to offer some. Most sound guys take pride in their work and want you to sound as good as possible.
   
   

If you have a good rapport with the sound guy, chances are he may go out of his way make sure you are happy with the sound and that you sound great out in the room. We've even seen bands tip the sound guy, before the set! That's not usually needed, but if you really want to keep him happy an extra $20 isn't gonna hurt. You might even get him to burn you a copy of the show right afterwards. Many sound guys record everything they mix. This could be a great way to collect material for a live CD or just a good way to listen to the band performing and get an idea of what does and doesn't work or who messed up what parts of the songs during that performance. It can be a great tool for improving the band overall.


Remember that every stage is different. No two sound systems will sound exactly alike. No two sound guys will mix you exactly the same and most importantly: It will always sound different than it does in your rehearsal space. Do what the sound engineer asks and you'll get the best sound possible for your show. Don't co-operate and you run the risk of pissing him off and then you certainly won't get his best effort.


An insulted sound guy may decide to crank the proverbial "Suck Button" up to 11 or just walk away from the board and drink a few shots while you're doing that amazing solo.


If you are unlucky and get a bad mix, just play as good as you can and hope for the best. That's what the seasoned pros do. So should you.

Here's a few real life stories:


A band played a medium sized club with a pro sound guy. This band had a great buzz going, even being mentioned as one of the best bands in the region. On stage their guitar amps were turned up too loud and despite the sound guy's repeated requests that they turn it down, they didn't. (When you just turn around and pretend to turn it down they can tell.) The sound guy had no choice but to take those instruments out of the mix and the result was an earsplitting mess of sound. Afterwards, the sound guy called up his buddy who worked sound at a club this band played regularly. He learned that they always have it up too loud and never turn it down enough. These guys now have a reputation among sound guys all over town and some clubs won't book them again just because they are too darn loud.


This author used to work at a blues club that featured nationally touring blues acts on a regular basis. Many of these guys had been touring for literally decades and had played everything from crappy juke joints with minimal sound systems to major festivals. The one thing they all did was keep their stage volume down and cooperate fully with the sound guy. These guys were a dream to work with because they had learned long ago to trust the sound guy. This was one reason they always sounded great on stage.


A local band, playing their first ever live show, could not understand why they couldn't hear themselves on stage. They refused to turn down their amps and when they asked for more in their monitors it created feedback. They did not understand that the sound guy was unable to accommodate them and got into a shouting match with him after their set. This band was not asked back to perform again. The club manager and/or booking people will usually side with their sound guy in these situations, especially if things get physical.

Never Date a Musician

Over the years we've seen countless relationships come and go and we've noticed a trend. It's always a bad idea to date a working musician.

Now, we are generalizing here, there are many musicians who have perfectly good, successful long-term relationships, it's just that these are the exception to the rule.

To women, male rockers have the same mystique and allure that strippers have for men. They're on stage, everyone wants one and almost nobody gets one. Indeed the successful stage musician (of either sex) can take his pick of attractive young women in the crowd. This is part of the problem as we'll explain later.

Relationships with musicians have all the same problems as other people have but some of them are more exaggerated. Here are the main ones:

1. Money: Many musicians are also starving artists. This is more true for younger rockers than older guys because, by the age of 30 most have either reached some level of success, at least enough to make a living, or have given up and taken a day job. Some, however, find ways to eek out a living and never really grow up. Others go from one woman (who is willing to pay their bills) to the next, living homeless in the interim. Many have never held down a day job for long and never want to.
2. Drugs: This has always been a part of rock and roll and probably always will be, but it's always a problem. It's a rare band that is filled with talented guys who keep themselves clean. Drugs are always readily available and are offered up free to band members on a regular basis. If you think your guy is gonna stay clean and sober for a long time, you're probably being naive.
3. Alcohol: Just like drugs, only not quite as illegal, alcohol is always a danger. Drugs and alcohol are obviously problematical in any relationship, but suppose you had to work in a bar every night. Do you think you could keep sober? Most people can't.
4. Infidelity: It doesn't matter how ugly or talentless a musician is, if you put a guitar in his hand and put him on stage, some hot girl will think he's the hottest thing since Sting. This is more of a problem when the band is on the road. We know bands who have a rule: "What happens on the road stays on the road." Kinda like Las Vegas, but it applies even with short trips to Nebraska. This one is the biggest relationship killer, especially if the band tours a lot. Even if he's not cheating, how can either partner know that the other is being faithful? And if the jealous spouse decides she'll just come to every gig to make sure he doesn't stray, that usually causes problems with the rest of the band. It can throw off the delicate dynamic the band has worked so hard to achieve amongst themselves. It's a sure fire recipe for drama. An insecure spouse wont be able to handle the idea that part of her husband's job as a rock-star is to flirt with beautiful young women, in the hopes they will buy CDs and come to more shows. It's part of the gig and even if he's being perfectly faithful, it's hard for many women to watch .

And god forbid if the significant other should decide to embrace the band by becoming their manager. That will almost always spell disaster. A lot of smart, experienced bands have a rule: No wives or girlfriends allowed at gigs.

Many musicians consider themselves artists and as such, they are elitist, thinking they are better or smarter than most people. This commonly leads them to believe they can live differently than most people and it's OK because they are "artists." These guys (and gals) think it's OK to get high a lot and that society owes them something, so they shouldn't have to work normal jobs. There's a high incidence of drug and alcohol abuse, poverty and general bad decision making. How many famous musicians have died of drug over doses? I can tell you that a hundred times more not-famous musicians have met similar fates. And if their "art" is perceived as being rejected, they are also susceptible to suicide.

If you think you can handle all that, and heaps of stunning women throwing themselves at your boyfriend, then by all means go for it. Maybe you'll get lucky and find one that has his shit together, but probably not.

Never Date a Musician!! I can't say it often enough, and no, I honestly don't expect you to believe me, until it's too late. Just please try not to repeat your mistake over and over again.

This is where I usually provide a real life example or two, but rather than tell a specific tale I'll just tell you how it usually goes:

A male musician meets and marries a perfectly good woman at some point before he becomes serious about working in music. Maybe they meet in College or even High School. It's all good until he joins that special band where everything is working out well and the band decides to tour farther away than they can drive in a day trip. The woman he left behind feels resentful that she can't go with him. After all, she has a job and has to support him. Sooner or later on the road the musician is approached by a very hot girl who wants to sleep with him, he cheats on the wife at home and... Well, you can guess how it goes from there.

Need we say more?
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Get On/Off the Stage Already!

If you are a local or regional touring act there are basically two kinds of gigs you will play: There's the play all night in the bar/restaurant kind of gig and there's the multi-band showcase, festival or opening act kind of gig. This article is about those gigs where you're at least opening for another act or perhaps playing the same show with three or more other bands.

The venue we work at and the majority of music venues that book original music in this region bring an average of four bands a night to play on any given night. Each band gets 30-45 minutes to play and there's 20-30 minutes between bands. Shows like this make it really important to be able to get on and off stage quickly and efficiently. The reasons behind this are important to keep in mind. If you take too long to get your gear on stage and ready to perform, then your band will likely get cut short. If you play over your time slot or take too long to get off stage, the band playing after you may get cut short. If you're an opening act for a national or bigger local act and they get cut short, their gonna remember that and likely take an opportunity to screw you over down the road. Now sure, your band might be better than any others out there (at least from your perspective) but causing a big show to go off schedule causes headaches for everyone from the guy taking money at the door, to the booking agent, the sound guy and even the bartenders. Yes, the crowd will complain if the band they paid big money to see doesn't get on stage at the expected time. Your band might be awesome but if the other bands all complain to the booking guy and make his life harder and he also hears bad reports from the sound engineer and the bartenders, then how eager is he gonna be to book you back? Most local music communities are fairly small and people talk to each other. If your band gets a reputation for hogging the stage at the expense of others, you're a lot less likely to be invited to play the cool gigs. Don't underestimate the politics of the music scene. They can be as brutal and vicious as a Jr. High school playground.

You were hired to start and end your set at specific times, so be professional and do your best to keep to the schedule.

Ok, now that you're clear on why you need to get on and off the stage quickly, here are some tips to help you do it:

If you're not the opening act, get as much of your gear unpacked and set up off to the side of the stage. Drummers should have all their hardware unpacked and set up, so they can just lift things up onto the stage and place them in position as quickly as possible. That means your cymbals should be out of the bag and on the stands. Guitar players should be ready to haul their amps onto the stage, position them and plug in. That means you should take your time and tune your guitar(s) before getting on stage, so that a last minute tuning check will go much quicker. Vocalists should be warmed up, in costume and ready help carry gear.

If you're not the headliner or closing act, get your gear off the stage first, then break it down. Drummers should haul the pieces off stage and then break them down and pack them up. We know you don't want to risk cracking that new Zildjian cymbal, so be careful and make sure anyone else who touches your gear does the same, but don't dismantle your cymbals and pack them up while still on stage.

Don't run off and have a smoke, piss and flirt before you start moving your gear. You're making life harder for everyone else playing after you, and half the staff as well.

Recruit a couple trustworthy (not too drunk) fans to help. Give them a free CD or put them on the guest list as a reward for helping the band.

Get someone else to sell your merch. There's plenty of time for signing autographs and schmoozing after you get your gear off the stage.



Here's a couple real-life stories:

A local jazz act with full horn section was booked to play a large street fair. The schedule was exceptionally tight with only 10 minutes between acts. That was never enough time for this jazz band who had a well known reputation for routinely taking 30-45 minutes to get onstage. This particular gig went even further south when the sound guy had trouble, causing extra delay. But the band leader didn't help by demanding a full sound check rather than the planned line check and mix on the fly approach. (A line check only checks to make sure everything is hooked up and signals are get through to the soundboard.) By the time the band actually got to play, there was only 10 minutes left in the set. The stage manager insisted on keeping to the schedule and cut the band off after only 2 songs. The huge crowd got ugly and many complaints were registered. Thankfully, there was no violence, but it did cause a very sizable commotion. The Fair organizers ended up so embarrassed by the incident that they booked the same band back the following year on a bigger stage with a longer set time, but made it crystal clear that the band had to get on stage and playing much quicker. They actually did.

A local R&B act with a little too much attitude routinely took 45-60 minutes (sometimes even more!) to get on stage. They would take their sweet time getting on stage, then take too long to finalize the sound check and then go to the green room to change into their costumes. One time, after a delay of more than an hour, the owner of the club had to go in to the green room to get them on stage. Then, of course, they insisted on playing their full set, instead of cutting it short in order to let the headliner get on stage. As a result, the sound engineers and booking guys don't want to work with them anymore and the headliner specifically requested that this band never opens for them again. Since the best sound guys don't want to work with them, either, they call in some second string, less experienced guys to work and the sound is never quite as good.

This blog and many more are available as Podcasts at: www.rockoncolorado.com/podcasts

Making the Most of Low Paying Gigs

By David Barber
RockOnColorado.com

Every band has to take low paying gigs from time to time. It may be a new venue/market where you don't have a following yet, or it's a benefit for a worthy cause that you are pleased to volunteer for, or just one of those nights where very few people show up and the venue doesn't want to pay you. Whatever the situation, you need to make the best of it. Here are a few commonly overlooked things you can do to make that crappy gig a little bit more tolerable.

1. Sell Your Merchandise. Always bring your merch with you to each and every gig, no matter how small or inconsequential the gig may seem. If you don't have any merchandise (CDs, T-shirts, Hats, etc.) You are missing out on an important revenue stream. It does take some cash and time (especially for a good CD) to get merchandise for resale, but it will almost always pay off. Start with a logo. Hire a graphic artist (or ask your family, friends, or even fans if any of them would be interested in helping out the band. You probably know someone already who has the artistic talents you need) and make sure it's done well. Plaster that logo everywhere, on T-shirts, CD inserts, hats, even underwear. Price it at around double what it cost to have them made and you are in business. There are many companies in your area that will gladly help you put your logo on almost anything. Do an Internet search for "promotional items" and you'll see what we mean. We like to deal with Comich, Inc. for the nontraditional items (like calendars, pens, and golf tees) and Red Eagle Design for cool embroidered hats and shirts. But you can always ask other bands in your area where they are getting good deals on their merch. (Prices vary widely, so shop around).
   Denver singer/songwriter Wendy Woo once played a gig at a coffee shop, where there was no cover charge and no pay from the venue. She sold hundreds of dollars worth of merch and turned the gig into a lucrative success.
   Benefits and similar all ages events are terrific for selling merch. Kids who aren't allowed to buy beer will instead spend their money on CDs and T-shirts. We've seen local bands sell out all their merch at nonpaying, all ages theater gigs where they were opening for a national act.
   Don't forget to mention from the stage where in the room CDs are available. As a door guy this author has seen a lot of people leave without buying anything because the band only sold stuff at the end of the night. Fans will ask the door man, the waitresses and bartenders where they can get a CD. If the answer is "I dunno." You're losing a sale.
2. Build your mailing list. It's as easy as a clipboard, paper and pencil. You should always try to build your mailing list at every gig. How often do venue booking managers ask "How many people can you bring in?" If you can reply with "our email list has 7,000 names on it," they may be more interested in booking your act. A mailing list is invaluable to keeping in touch with your fans.
   The best way to get people to sign up is to have a band member walk around the room after each gig or during set breaks and personally invite people to sign up. If that becomes too much hassle for the band, recruit a friend, family member or fan to walk around during the set and ask people to sign up. (If they walk around selling CDs as well, you're gonna sell more of them.)
   Email lists can be a hassle to maintain manually and can land you on spammer lists if you aren't careful. There are many solutions that you can find yourself with a quick search on the Internet. Commotion Music Promotion, Inc. offers bargain priced email list management for bands or any other business.
3. Make an Impression. A great big logo on the bass drum head is a good start. A 6 foot wide banner hung as a backdrop is even better. Nothing frustrates us more than when a friend or colleague tells us about this cool new band they saw recently, but whose name they can't remember. By the end of your set, everyone in the room should know your act's name. Don't be shy. Repeat it at the start and end of every set. Mention that you have merch available, and ask the audience to please sign up on the mailing list. And above all: play your heart out!
   You never know who will be in the room. Even if it's a sparse crowd and there doesn't seem to be much energy there, play like it's a sold out stadium show each and every time. If you're not into it, then learn to fake it. Believe me, there are acts on the road right now who make their living by pretending to have a fantastic time on stage, even when they are deathly ill (Country Dick Montana of the Beat Farmers died while performing on stage after a long and painful bout with cancer.)
   Love.45 used to play hotel gigs in Denver, before they were signed, in order to help them pay for studio time and the cost of mailing out hundreds of promo packs. One night we attended one of these gigs where the crowd was pretty lame. But there was this one guy, in town to visit relatives, who was blown away. So what? It turned out that he worked for a major label and said he would go back home and tell his boss and anyone else who would listen that the band should be signed. Nothing came of that encounter, but you never know.
   The now defunct band Sucker was based in Vail, CO. At one gig they impressed a software exec. who was in town for a snowboarding vacation. The result was enough money to record and video one song that ended up being used in a popular Nintendo game. They even included the video as a bonus in the game.
4. Be Professional. OK, so it's one of your bread and butter gigs where you usually draw a full house, but this night it's half empty because of bad weather, a big playoff game, or something else you can't control. Do NOT let this affect the way you play. Play it just like the house was full. Fake it if you have to, but smile and act like you're having the time of your life. Do NOT get drunk, play sloppy, take long breaks and quit early because you're in a bad mood. Do NOT get mad at the door guy, the booking manager, the opening act, or any of the staff because you didn't get paid as much as usual. Force yourself to smile and say "Thanks." Remember, the venue staff only made half of what they were hoping for, too. It's not always easy, but it's very important. There are bands we won't mention who have worn out their welcome in an entire region due to years of repeated unprofessional behavior. It doesn't matter if you are the best guitar player since Jimi Hendrix. If you act like an asshole or a prima-donna all the time, word will spread and you'll be lucky to get coffeeshop gigs.
   

Most of this stuff is just common sense, but it will help to take your act to the next level if you can deal with the lousy gigs as well as the great ones.

This blog and many more are available as Podcasts at: www.rockoncolorado.com/podcasts